The Adventures of Hank, continued…

“Yes, my friend Dan lives in Ohio.” Hank answers the Policeman’s question. “Then who is Dave?” asked the Policeman. Hank knew if his answer wasn’t satisfactory, there would definitely be a trip to the local police station. “Dave is my buddy from college. Dan, Dave and I are old school friends.” Hank explained. Day had broken over the park and this strange scene. “I feel like I’ve seen you somewhere?” The EMT tells Hank as he writes notes on his clipboard. The Policeman looks up from his notes and the Jogger takes a closer look at Hank. The Jogger starts scrolling through her phone. The EMT stares at Hank. “I really feel like I’ve seen you before.” The EMT says. But before Hank could say another word. The Jogger waves her phone around and yells “He’s Forrest Gump.” The policeman puts his notes down and says. “Run Forrest, Run. My girlfriend and I watched you run on youtube. You just kept running and running.” Hank was more confused than before but the policeman was treating him like a celebrity. “Well, that explains why you were so dehydrated.” Says the EMT And why my legs stopped working, Hank thought. The Policeman put his notes away. “That’s why you gave me a crazy story about your friends Darren and Dwayne. You were just trying to be modest. Wait until I tell my wife I met Forest Gump, passed out in a park.” Why do they keep calling him Forrest Gump? Hank keeps repeating the name Forest Gump in his head, until it all hits him like a ton of bricks.
To keep himself and the general public safe Hank only watches TV in an emergency. And since he was 16 he never watches TV drunk. When Hank was 16 he cut out of school to hangout with his friend Benny. Benny and Hank drank beers they stole from Hank’s Dad, after a series of Prank phone calls they watched TV. The movie “Death Wish” was on TV. Hank watched a scene where Charles Bronson killed a drug dealer, then Hank beat up Benny’s brother Tim and flushed his stash down the toilet(Tim was the local E and Weed dealer). Benny and Hank never spoke again. Benny’s family never called the police and Hank’s parents took him out of school. Hank’s family left town six months later.
Hank remembers running into a bar after stopping the robbers, he ordered a shot and a beer. The bar was empty and somebody asked for the TV to be put on. Hank couldn’t remember how many drinks he had but he remembers the movie “Forrest Gump” coming on, it was the scene where Tom Hanks runs across the country. Hank had finally solved the mystery, he got drunk watched the movie and ran from Canada to Ohio.

The Adventures of Hank, continued…

“Mister, are you alright? Should I call 911?”. The frantic Jogger yelled at Hank laying on the ground. The orange Sun shinned brighter over the park, Hank looked around him but could not understand how he got there. The Jogger got on her cell phone and called 911. “Hello, I’m at Garfield Park and this weird dude just passed out. I don’t know his name he asked me if he was in Canada and when I told him he was in Ohio he fainted…I think he’s still breathing..Yes, the entrance on 3rd. I’ll stay on the line until you get here.” Hank heard the Jogger’s call to 911 and jumped back on his feet. Hank took a long breath, looked down at his legs and said “You can do this.” Hank started to walk slowly away from the Jogger back toward the park. The Jogger saw Hank and screamed at him.”Hey, where are you going? I just called 911 and they’re on the way.” Hank turned his walk into a slow jog. “I’m feeling much better, thanks for the help.” Hank yelled at the Jogger as he ran back into the park. Hank jogged over to the first bench he saw and sat down. Hank’s body was exhausted but he couldn’t wait around for the ambulance. He sat on the bench thinking about his exit strategy. Only a few minutes passed and he heard sirens coming, one of the sirens was the police. “You’ve got this!” Hank said to himself. He jumped off the bench and started to jog further into the park. Hank’s body could only jog for a few seconds, his legs gave out again and he fell down. “There he is.” The jogger pointed at Hank laying on the ground. Hank was only able to jug about 50 feet from the entrance. Two EMT’s and a policeman approached Hank laying on the ground. As the three walked over to Hank he tried to get up but could not lift himself off the ground. Hank sat up and said “I’m fine, guys.” One of the EMT’s slowly approached Hank, the police man talked to the Jogger. Hank could not hear their conversation. “What’s your name?” The EMT said to Hank for the 2nd time. The 1st request was ignored by Hank because he was trying to hear the conversation between the cop and Jogger. “Sorry, it’s Hank.” Hank said, still trying to hear the conversation. “Do you know where you are?” Asked the EMT. “Yeah, I’m in Ohio.” Hank trying to play things off. “I was drinking a lot last night with my friend, Dave. He’s getting married on Saturday.” “Do you know what today is?” Asked the EMT. Hank watched the Jogger and policeman, he felt relieved because he could tell that the cop was flirting with the jogger and less concerned with him. “Sir, do you know what today is?” The EMT asked one more time. Hank was about to answer but didn’t want to alarm them if said “Thursday” and it was Monday. He knew it was Wednesday night when he was walking around Vancouver looking for Weed but now he was in Ohio. “Yeah, sure it’s Friday.” Hank took a guess, hoping he was close. The EMT told him he was correct. Hank felt so pleased with himself, he thought he might survive this encounter with the law without a trip to the police station. He knew if they brought him to the Police station they would put his fingerprints into the system. Just as a little smile started to appear on Hank’s face the policeman walked over to him. The EMT’s were taking Hank’s vital signs. “Sir, can I see your ID.” the policeman said to Hank as he gawked at the Jogger. “I lost it, sir.” Hank said sheepishly. The policeman still keeping his eyes on the jogger said. “Do you have a Passport, Credit card something with your name on it?” Hank took out his empty wallet and said. “No, I lost my ID and credit cards.” The policeman quickly took his eyes off the jogger, fixed them on Hank and said. “Lost them?” Hank realized how all this must look and said. “Yeah, I was drinking with my friend Dave and he is such a clown. I passed out from too many shots, he took my Id, Credit cards and left me here. I owe him a good one.” Hank made a slapping jester with his right hand and gave him the biggest smile he could. The policeman’s expression changed, things became serious. “Your dehydrated, Hank.” Said the EMT has he looked for a vain to put in a IV. “Where do you live? Asked the policeman as he wrote in his little black book. Hank knew that book was not for the Jogger’s phone number. Hank couldn’t think of anything besides the truth and said. “New York” after a pause that seemed to last for hours(5 seconds) Hank continues. “But my friend Dan lives in Ohio.” The Policeman looked at his notes and said. “I thought your friends name is Dave.”

The Adventures of Hank, continued…

Hank was woken by a dog licking his face and a Homeless man looking through his pockets. “I was making sure you were still alive.” The Homeless man said to Hank after he woke up, Hank was in to much of a haze to care about the attempted robbery. Hank pushed the dog back with his hand and sat up. “Lets go Checkers, this guy has less than us.” Hank sat up and looked around the empty park, it was dawn,Hank could see a bright orange Sun rising over the trees. He could not remember how he ended up on this bench in a park. Hank looked through his pockets and found an empty wallet, his money and cards were gone. He still had his hotel key, but why not go back to his hotel? Hank stood up and quickly fell back down on the bench, he realized that he must have taken something or been given it and the effects have not quite worn off. Hank searched his memories and could not remember anything past the robbery he thwarted. He remembers running out the back door of the bar before the police could see him. He remembers running for a least 1 mile or 2 before the adrenaline wore off. Did he keep running until he passed out in the park on this bench? No, he tastes alcohol in his mouth, he must of had a drink before ending up at the park. Hank only remembers Running. He tried one more time to get up and his legs were stable enough to walk. Hank walked towards the exit of the park, he looked around but had no clue where he was. Hank walked out of the park, he was in a residential neighborhood surrounded by houses. Hank didn’t remember seeing any of these houses when he was running through the streets of Vancouver, Canada. He looked around for some kind of clues, maybe he was just outside the city but where? Hank saw a jogger coming towards the park, it was a young girl in her early 20’s wearing black jogging shorts and a black sports bra, she was in excellent shape. The Jogger was wearing headphones and as she ran towards the park Hank began to wave her down, he had his hotel key in hand. She stopped running and took out her headphones. “Hey, sorry to bother you but I had a little too much to drink and ended up sleeping it off in the park. Can you tell me how to get to the Hyatt?” Hank asked her. “Mister, we only have one motel in town and that’s the Motel 6 on Armstrong way.” Great, Hank thought, he must have ended up in some random town in Canada. “How far are we from Vancouver? Will a taxi be too expensive, lost my phone can’t even call a Lyft.” an embarrassed Hank told her. The jogger gave him a strange look. “Vancouver, is that in Kentucky?” Hank looked very confused and said “No, Vancouver Canada.”
“Sir, your in Madeira, Ohio just outside Cincinnati.” the Jogger explaining to Hank. Hank felt his legs getting weak again. “Ohio!” Hank said before falling to the ground.