Monthly Archives: March 2017

The Adventures of Hank Part II

Hank watched the Homeless Guy go into the Apartment Building he said the Weed Dealer lived in. Hank looked at his Watch, it’s been 15 minutes and no Homeless Guy. After 30 mins Hank decided to look inside the Fanny Pack, he unzipped the pack and looked inside. Inside the Fanny Pack was; a softcover copy of Sidney Sheldon’s ‘Master of The Game'(Hank had seen the made for TV movie.) and an empty bottle of Tylenol. This shit was worthless to Hank, his buzz from the Hotel Bar was gone, he was annoyed by the situation and worst of all, Hank really wanted the Weed. Hank grew angrier when he remembered meeting the Homeless Guy by the dumpster. The Homeless Guy pulled something(the fanny Pack) from the Dumpster and Hank just paid $10 for it. Waisting no more time waiting on the street corner, Hank was off to find Weed.
The Bartender at the Hotel Bar told Hank he can smoke Weed at a Cafe downtown, the only problem they don’t sell it at the Cafe. Hank knew his best chance of finding Weed would be to near or at the Cafe.

The Adventures of Hank. Part I

Hank stepped off the bus, it was his first time in Vancouver, Canada. The bus ride was 20 mins and for the last 15 Hank needed to pee, his Bladder was at maximum capacity. Before he got on the bus Hank was drinking at the hotel bar, after three beers Hank decided to get on the next bus to downtown Vancouver. The Bartender told Hank where to catch the bus, he paid for drinks, left a good tip and walked out of the bar to catch the next bus. Hank had a nice buzz on the bus but couldn’t enjoy it because he felt his Bladder was going to burst(Most likely he would’ve pissed himself, again). Hank and his Bladder made it to the stop.
HanK stepped off the bus, looked for a bar or coffee shop but it was just office buildings and apartments. Hank started to panic because he felt the pee about to escape like Old Faithful, he looked for a place on the street to pee. He walked half a block and saw an alley with dumpsters. Hank is from New York, NY and knows that next to a dumpster is a great place to pee. Hank decided to pee in-between two dumpsters. Hank let the pee free like he was a Firefighter using the Firehose to save his own house. After the last drip had dropped, Hank noticed a Homeless Guy digging through one of the dumpsters Hank peed near. Hank was a little embarrassed but not surprised. The homeless guy waited for Hank to finish before he asked him where he was from. Hank told him he was from New York. The Homeless Guy asked Hank if he wanted Weed, and of course Hank said Yes. The Homeless Guy told him he could get him a bag of Weed for $10. (This was Canadian Money and Hank treated it like it was Monopoly money because of all the colors.) It was Hanks first time in Vancouver but not his first trip to Canada. Hank had been to Montreal hundreds of times and bought weed from Homeless People on the street. Hank followed the guy a few blocks when they stopped on a street corner near an Apartment building. The Homeless guy pointed to a building and said the dealer lives there, he told Hank he couldn’t go into the building. The Homeless Guy told him to wait here on the corner and he would go inside to get him the bag of Weed. Hank agreed to give him the $10 and for collateral the Homeless Guy gave Hank his fanny pack which felt heavy. The Homeless Guy took the $10 told Hank he be back in 5 mins with his Weed, he walked into the building….

The Race of Three Slugs(IIL). Part 3

Just minutes away from the start of the Race of Three Slugs; Representative Sanchez(Mars) is in lane 2, Representative Jim(Moon) lane 3, Representative Wind(David Bowie ) lane 1. Representative Smith(Earth) lane 4. The Cannon will go off at the top of the hour, starting the Slug Race.
The Cannon has sounded, the Racers are off. After the 1st lap(2.5mins tying a course record) Sanchez is in the lead followed by; Wind, Jim and Smith is in last place. With one lap left, Wind has taken the lead, followed by; Sanchez, Smith and Jim in last place. Sachez wins the race by .05 seconds a slug door opens and his car is taken through it. Wind finishes in 2nd place, his car is taken through the second slug door. Representative Jim and Smith race for 3rd place and their lives. Smith has a .03s lead going into the final 300 meters. With under 50 meters to go Jim’s Slug races past Smith, finishing in 3rd place, the final door opens taking Jim’s Slug car through it. The door closes, track loses power and drifts into space taking Representative Smith with it. Tonight, there will be a great feast(Slug Feast) for the Winners. Representative Smith’s name will be etched on the Great Wall of the IIL.
Since Representative Sanchez won the Slug Race he decides the next competition, he must announce his choice at the Slug Feast. The next competition will be held 3 days after the Feast.